Crash Trash and Weekend Bash! The MJ Club Crawl.

[David]

we are deploying male reviewers as we speak, david~!

In the meantime, there are the tragic photos of the two girls getting tossed off the mechanical bull.

Ahhh those maverick girls. It really does take a classy lady to attempt a mechincal bull ride in a mini skirt!

Very entertaining nonetheless

[Captain Zissou]

I recently won a VIP night at Twisted Martini for 6, which made me very excited, until I saw the douche convention as photographed by the metrojax reviewers inside.  You say "cute boys", I say people I will probably punch, or at least argue with while there. 

SDare, I'm a republican, if you needed further explanation for my partying ways. 

[stephElf]

Fusion is stunning in the inside. I have an obsession with their chandeliers that hang over the bar - I saw them once on some HGTV type show a few years ago and have been in love ever since. And I agree, being from New York and having the opportunity to go to several "frou-frou" places there for a night out, this place could fit right into Manhattan's cityscape.

For me personally, I think this place makes for a great Happy Hour spot or a date night.

If the owners are reading, you may want to consider getting a few simple eats.  A cheese plate, olive tapenade...some dainty, non-messy desserts like petit fours. People will wind up leaving and spending less money, simply because they are starving.  If you do offer food and I somehow missed that, my apologies.

[Captain Zissou]

Douchebags don't dance, they party.  Douchebags don't drink, they get F***** up.  Douchebags don't relax, they chill.  I could go on and on and on............

I swear we didn't used to have this epidemic of societal degradation in Jax.  The past 5 or 6 years have been a downward spiral in my opinion.  Everyone tags guidos as the scum of the earth, but if you took off those 'chill bros' hats positioned at about 10 o'clock on their heads (12 o'clock pointing forward), and spiked their hair with some hair gel, you couldn't tell the difference. 

Folks need to read a book, wear clothes that fit, find something interesting to bring to the conversation, and THEN go out. 

[TREE4309]

When do the club reviews start and the cute guy reports end?

www.instantrimshot.com

Seriously though, this exercise really does help me confirm what I already assumed about some of the places that I have purposely avoided in the past...thanks for taking one for the team!

Finally, I just want to repost this picture for my own personal amusement. 

http://www.metrojacksonville.com/gallery/index.php?i=669100428&ik=Vvrff&g=9841444&gk=ufXxF

How old do you have to be to get into Twisted Martini anyway? Ha!

[TREE4309]

aaaand that picture link didn't work...help me out here stephen!

[fsujax]

Thats the beauty of going to Downtown to club. So many different types of people and places to visit. At least it isn't stale or homogeneous!

[DavidWilliams]

^^^^Tools and knobs are the terms that come immediately to mind for me.

[Captain Zissou]

Accurate description, DWilliams.  I'd rather talk about crops with the Mavericks crowd than hear how chill, dank, or sweet these bros are.

[Captain Zissou]

Im going to guess Navy boys out on the town, from the haircuts.

Not too obnoxious, I suppose.

If that's our Navy, I'm nervous to be living in a coastal city.

[stephElf]

^^^^Tools and knobs are the terms that come immediately to mind for me.

Man, you guys are a tough crowd. They are just a bunch of kids having fun. They are like 21/22 ... they don't even know who they are yet.

Granted I am 10 years older then them and they don't necessarily look like "my type" - but sheesh.

[stephElf]

So which of you guys was doing karaoke again?

Um "bewler" aka Brett did 2... the Smiths and the Doors (which I missed) ... and then myself and my friend Rach did a very, very pathetic rendition of Black Velvet when the mic got shoved in our faces. 

Brett is actually a decent performer!

[David]

That would be Bewler. He has a good stage presence!  My acquaintance Will, who isn't on here,  was one of the shirtless wonders belting out the hits of yesteryear.

[Captain Zissou]

In fairness, I will meet up on the next club crawl and you guys can post my picture and ridicule it all you want.  I'm 22 and may not know entirely who I am, but I think I might stand up a little better to the critics on this website.

[DavidWilliams]

All in good fun...thankfully there weren't a lot of camera phones out there in my hard running days.