This past Saturday my friend Brittney and I pigged out at Hbachi, a lovely Chinese buffet. After stuffing my face with ribs, orange chicken, and baby octopus I planned to head home & fall asleep watching Law & Order.
However, Brittney managed to talk me into going down to the beach for some nightlife fun with some friends of hers. I reluctantly tagged along. Surprisingly I was having a good time. After walking the beach laughing and checking out a few places, we settled into a restaurant/nightclub and danced away. I looked around and observed a few navy men dancing, a soon-to-be bride celebrating her engagement with her girlfriends, and a very pregnant girl in the middle of the dance floor slowly bobbing her head.
She looked confused as if she'd gotten lost on her way to lamaze class.
The hilarious 2007 movie, Knocked Up, immediately came to mind. The scene where Katherine Heigl's character and her sister are denied entrance into a club by the bouncer because the sister is old and Heigl is pregnant.
I've never pictured a pregnant woman and nightlife a compatible pair.
First off, sometimes people get stupid in bars/clubs. Fights break out and if it's crowded people knock into one another. Hardly a peaceful environment for a Mom-to-be.
Almost everyone has a stereotype, including pregnant gals. Society paints club-hopping pregnant women as ladies who want to have all the fun they can before diaper duty, sleepless nights, and burping.
Or...another view is the "I still got it" attitude, meaning you can still be the sexy, fun party girl with or without a bun in the oven.
I have mixed views on the subject. A part of me feels they should keep their pregnant behinds at home and another feels that they should be allowed to have fun like everyone else.
What do you think?
I think... Why would anybody care? Seems kind of gossipy and finger pointy to me... :o ::)
QuoteFirst off, sometimes people get stupid in bars/clubs. Fights break out and if it's crowded people knock into one another. Hardly a peaceful environment for a Mom-to-be.
No way.....Personally, I like the drunk fights by the 'necks on the beach after they are fighting over a girl.
Life is about choices, so if the mom-to-be wants to be out and subjected to all that goes on in a bar, go for it, but thankfully we live in the USA and she can do as she pleases.
Quote from: BridgeTroll on June 20, 2012, 06:47:30 AM
I think... Why would anybody care? Seems kind of gossipy and finger pointy to me... :o ::)
Lol, okay.
Nothing wrong with dancing and having fun, but Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is no joke.
If a pregnant woman has the energy to go out and dance, then more power to her. I for one was sound asleep by 10 pm almost every night when I was pregnant since being knocked up was incredibly exhausting!
Quote from: Dog Walker on June 20, 2012, 01:12:09 PM
Nothing wrong with dancing and having fun, but Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is no joke.
She doesn't have to drink to be there. But she has no choice about breathing in the second-hand smoke. That would give me pause if I was in her shoes.
I have no issue with pregnant women in a club.
I do, however, take exception to people bringing their kids to a bar.
Quote from: Adam W on June 20, 2012, 02:20:13 PM
I have no issue with pregnant women in a club.
I do, however, take exception to people bringing their kids to a bar.
I'm sorry, what? There are people who bring their children to bars????
Quote from: finehoe on June 20, 2012, 02:16:36 PM
Quote from: Dog Walker on June 20, 2012, 01:12:09 PM
Nothing wrong with dancing and having fun, but Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is no joke.
She doesn't have to drink to be there. But she has no choice about breathing in the second-hand smoke. That would give me pause if I was in her shoes.
I thought smoking wasn't allowed in nightclubs
Look, if she's drinking for two, she better be tipping for two. ;)
Tamara, I had to laugh. Couldn't help myself. What year is it? Did I take a nap and wake up in Victorian England? Is it 1882 or 2012? Did we women of the 1960's burn our bras for nothing? :-)
"Back in the Victorian era a proper young lady had to learn the rules of etiquette everything from how to walk down the street to how to eat fruit ever so elegantly (first peeling it with a silver knife and cutting it in bite-size morsels).
Should a lady find herself to be pregnant, it is much preferred that she keep it hidden. The lady’s family may refer to her as being ‘in a delicate condition’ or ‘in the family way’. The lady of ‘delicate condition’, if she wishes, should invest in a maternity corset in which to assist in hiding her belly. When it can no longer be hidden, she may stay at home."
Quote from: Debbie Thompson on June 20, 2012, 10:59:58 PM
Tamara, I had to laugh. Couldn't help myself. What year is it? Did I take a nap and wake up in Victorian England? Is it 1882 or 2012? Did we women of the 1960's burn our bras for nothing? :-)
"Back in the Victorian era a proper young lady had to learn the rules of etiquette everything from how to walk down the street to how to eat fruit ever so elegantly (first peeling it with a silver knife and cutting it in bite-size morsels).
Should a lady find herself to be pregnant, it is much preferred that she keep it hidden. The lady’s family may refer to her as being ‘in a delicate condition’ or ‘in the family way’. The lady of ‘delicate condition’, if she wishes, should invest in a maternity corset in which to assist in hiding her belly. When it can no longer be hidden, she may stay at home."
I'm happy I can make you laugh, my dear. It is indeed the year 2012, you're right. I said A PART of me feels carrying a child and being at the club isn't necessary and ANOTHER PART feels like everyone deserves to have fun. My view is the health of an unborn child. Sometimes the crazy things that happpen during nightlife can't be peaceful on a pregnancy. My post has nothing to do with a prudish, conservative point of view because I'm far from that.
As I said in my post, when I saw a pregnant lady in the club I thought of a funny movie scene. I didn't approach the girl wagging my finger, telling her she needs to be home knitting. Lol so trust me, I'm far from some tight ass.
However, I appreciate your opinion.
:)
QuoteI thought smoking wasn't allowed in nightclubs
You have not been to Monty's, obviously!
I didn't think you were, Tamara. Like I said, I was laughing. But I also had a vision. Mine wasn't in a movie though. Mine was real. When I graduated, options for women were pretty limited. Clerical, nurse, teacher, teller were pretty much it for most women. As late as the 1980s a bank officer told me he wanted my husband to co-sign for a $2500 car I was buying, even though I was well qualifed for it myself. (I refused.) And note, there were no female bank officers to discuss it with. :-)
We have come pretty far since then, so the picture of anyone thinking a pregnant woman didn't belong in certain places made me laugh, although it also made me sad. Like that movie scene you referred to. I saw it too. And I thought, "Why should they be refused entrance to a club because one is old and the other pregnant?"
But mostly I laughed, because at least we aren't stuck in Victorian England, where ladies had to stay INDOORS when pregnant, couldn't work unless it was as a servant, and could not leave abusive husbands because their husbands owned all their assets.
So in that sense, I found it funny. Because we have come a long way, baby.
Quote
Because we have come a long way, baby.
...but please don't smoke your Virginia Slims if you're "with child" ;)
This is a good example of how a question is phrased will determine the answer one gets. I think very few people would go so far as to question whether or not a pregnant woman should be able to go anywhere she pleases, or be refused entrance to a club. The real question is does it show good judgement on her part to possibly expose her unborn child to what could be an unhealthy situation.
Like buying a large soda in NYC? :o
QuoteQuoteVirginia Slims if you're "with child"
I can see this on Stephen Colbert! :P
I dunno, I've ALWAYS thought that women who are in the family way are the most beautiful people on earth... Often feeling ugly, fat or unattractive, or worse being told those things, I see it as the ultimate feminine state and absolutely lovely.
"Shanna, they bought their tickets, they knew what they were getting into ... I say, let 'em dance." Gee, I haven't seen anything like this since the Anita Bryant concert.
OCKLAWAHA
If she's in the club, she probably spent more time picking out her shoes than she did picking the father of her child...
Quote from: Debbie Thompson on June 21, 2012, 01:25:59 PM
I didn't think you were, Tamara. Like I said, I was laughing. But I also had a vision. Mine wasn't in a movie though. Mine was real. When I graduated, options for women were pretty limited. Clerical, nurse, teacher, teller were pretty much it for most women. As late as the 1980s a bank officer told me he wanted my husband to co-sign for a $2500 car I was buying, even though I was well qualifed for it myself. (I refused.) And note, there were no female bank officers to discuss it with. :-)
We have come pretty far since then, so the picture of anyone thinking a pregnant woman didn't belong in certain places made me laugh, although it also made me sad. Like that movie scene you referred to. I saw it too. And I thought, "Why should they be refused entrance to a club because one is old and the other pregnant?"
But mostly I laughed, because at least we aren't stuck in Victorian England, where ladies had to stay INDOORS when pregnant, couldn't work unless it was as a servant, and could not leave abusive husbands because their husbands owned all their assets.
So in that sense, I found it funny. Because we have come a long way, baby.
Lol, you're right! You're right! We have come so far. So you know what? Pregnant women should partake in raves, mosh pits, bungee jumping, cart wheels, riding motorcycles at the highest speed, wrestling, scuba diving, and boxing.
I mean, since we have come such a long way, right? We're free, baby!
Quote from: RockStar on June 24, 2012, 01:23:50 AM
If she's in the club, she probably spent more time picking out her shoes than she did picking the father of her child...
I don't believe I'd of said that brother!
Conversely could it be that someone like you caused the condition and she was at the club simply to lose the implied guilt?
Why the double standard? Wouldn't the same be true of a man who gets sexually irresponsible after a few drinks in the club?
Quote from: Ocklawaha on July 03, 2012, 11:17:45 PM
Quote from: RockStar on June 24, 2012, 01:23:50 AM
If she's in the club, she probably spent more time picking out her shoes than she did picking the father of her child...
I don't believe I'd of said that brother!
Conversely could it be that someone like you caused the condition and she was at the club simply to lose the implied guilt?
Why the double standard? Wouldn't the same be true of a man who gets sexually irresponsible after a few drinks in the club?
^^Ock, seriously? What a bunch of crap. Yeah, it's the bars' fault for providing an avenue for her to lose her inhibitions and let anybody knock her up. And yeah, it's the bars' fault for man being man. Give me a break. You know what? It's always somebody else's fault. My point was that, if she's prego and she's still hanging out at the club, her future child is low on her list of priorities, just like choosing the father of her child was.
Personal responsibility? Doesn't exist anymore.
I prefer when you talk about trains.
^At any rate, I expect her money would spend just as well at your place as it would elsewhere.
Quote from: RockStar on July 04, 2012, 12:49:31 AM
Quote from: Ocklawaha on July 03, 2012, 11:17:45 PM
Quote from: RockStar on June 24, 2012, 01:23:50 AM
If she's in the club, she probably spent more time picking out her shoes than she did picking the father of her child...
I don't believe I'd of said that brother!
Conversely could it be that someone like you caused the condition and she was at the club simply to lose the implied guilt?
Why the double standard? Wouldn't the same be true of a man who gets sexually irresponsible after a few drinks in the club?
^^Ock, seriously? What a bunch of crap. Yeah, it's the bars' fault for providing an avenue for her to lose her inhibitions and let anybody knock her up. And yeah, it's the bars' fault for man being man. Give me a break. You know what? It's always somebody else's fault. My point was that, if she's prego and she's still hanging out at the club, her future child is low on her list of priorities, just like choosing the father of her child was.
Personal responsibility? Doesn't exist anymore.
I prefer when you talk about trains.
It depends on what she is doing and how often she is there. If it's a one-time thing where her girlfriends dragged her along, I get that. If she's there all the time, then it's a little pathetic. I mean...who the hell is going to hit on a pregnant chick?
Lol
Wow, without getting into the politics of it and the women's liberation movement and so on and so forth, if I ever went to a club and saw or bumped into some awkward pregger woman hanging out on the dance floor all by herself, I would be staying the hell away from that place going forward!!! What is the purpose of a doorman if there are no standards??
I don't know the woman's situation enough to feel sorry for her or upset with her, but I do feel sorry for all the other clubgoers! Ew
@Tach. LOL, well, we wouldn't serve someone obviously pregnant, for one. But I do enjoy making "mock"tails for pregnant women that make it appear as though they are drinking just to shock other people (think n/a cosmo-esque martini).
(There was a reality/comedy show called "Women Behaving Badly" that did a hilarious skit with a girl at a bar, leaning agains it, appearing to get hammered and, when she backed away, looked as though she was 8mo pregnant...)
In response to your statement though, yes, Wells Fargo doesn't care where the money comes from and neither do my creditors. Regardless however, I do, as previously stated.
And this thread is about clubs, not bars. There is a difference.
(of course, she can't get pregnant twice at the same time...lol. Juuuusssst kidding take it easy people...)
Quote from: RockStar on July 04, 2012, 01:29:08 AM
(of course, she can't get pregnant twice at the same time...lol. Juuuusssst kidding take it easy people...)
Sounds like that woman was really trying to get some! Pregnant women are horny as **** from what I hear :) I can just picture her "sneaking" a Virginia Slim in one hand and holding a cocktail in the other, eye******* all the men in the club, 99% of whom came with non-prego girls (girls who probably got them in there).
#awkwardmoments
Quote from: RockStar on July 04, 2012, 12:49:31 AM
Quote from: Ocklawaha on July 03, 2012, 11:17:45 PM
Quote from: RockStar on June 24, 2012, 01:23:50 AM
If she's in the club, she probably spent more time picking out her shoes than she did picking the father of her child...
I don't believe I'd of said that brother!
Conversely could it be that someone like you caused the condition and she was at the club simply to lose the implied guilt?
Why the double standard? Wouldn't the same be true of a man who gets sexually irresponsible after a few drinks in the club?
^^Ock, seriously? What a bunch of crap. Yeah, it's the bars' fault for providing an avenue for her to lose her inhibitions and let anybody knock her up. And yeah, it's the bars' fault for man being man. Give me a break. You know what? It's always somebody else's fault. My point was that, if she's prego and she's still hanging out at the club, her future child is low on her list of priorities, just like choosing the father of her child was.
Personal responsibility? Doesn't exist anymore.
I prefer when you talk about trains.
Sorry that the woman in question is not a train RockStar. The fact is you apparently don't know her but have already suggested that she is a poor example or worse a poor mother for being in a club and... shock of all shocks... DANCING!
My whole point being what gives you or anyone else the right to condemn her moral standing in the community just because she was there?
Unborn babies hear sounds and respond to them, and pregnant mothers need exercise to stay in good health, sounds like a recipe to go dancing to me. Even if she was shitfaced drunk, I'd still question the circumstances that led her to such a dangerous condition before I started heaping blame on her.
Pregnancy is as natural as rain, but for some reason, our freethinking members of MJ have decided to go 'Quaker' on this woman. Could the answer be this is fallout from the Jehovah's Witness convention being held in Gainesville?
The question was asked, 'Who would hit on a pregnant woman?' I've got to say I don't get it? If I were still single and in my twenties or thirties, I would have ZERO problem asking her out, if it led to a more serious relationship I'd be cool with that too. Wedding bells? I wouldn't be married to her condition, I'd be married to HER, heart, soul and mind. That baby, whoever the father was, would be part of her and would be loved accordingly.
Well, when you're about to be a Mom that newborn needs you 100 percent and I don't know if beginning a relationship should be a priority. It goes both ways. Would you be ready to instantly accept that position? Her life is about to change, especially if it's her first. You'd want to just jump in there with her? Dating someone with kids doesn't seem like a problem, because at least time has gone by. A pregnant, single woman though? I don't know.
I thought the question was whether pregnant women belong in a dance club.
I don't know any guy in his right mind who'd hit on an obviously pregnant girl.
Although, some possible pick up lines:
"Hey babe, you've got a nice glow..."
"Are you lactating or just happy to see me?"
"Hey, since you can't get pregnant twice, wanna go back to my place?"
"Can I buy you a drink? She'll have a water, double Jack rocks for me..."
"Who's your daddy?" (looking at belly)
;)
Have a fun 4th all....prego or not!
QuoteI thought the question was whether pregnant women belong in a dance club.
Me too. If she is simply dancing and socializing what is the harm? Taverns, pubs, bars, clubs have been centers of social interaction since invented. Why should a pregnant woman cut herself off from friends simply bcause she is pregnant? Give me a break... If she is drinking... that is another question ENTIRELY. Would you disapprove if she danced alone at home? sheesh... ::) :o
Thank's BT, FINALLY another voice of reasoned sanity!
Quote from: Ocklawaha on July 04, 2012, 02:38:24 PM
Thank's BT, FINALLY another voice of reasoned sanity!
Many would not credit me with that attribute... ;)
Quote from: RockStar on July 04, 2012, 12:15:53 PM
I thought the question was whether pregnant women belong in a dance club.
I don't know any guy in his right mind who'd hit on an obviously pregnant girl.
Although, some possible pick up lines:
"Hey babe, you've got a nice glow..."
"Are you lactating or just happy to see me?"
"Hey, since you can't get pregnant twice, wanna go back to my place?"
"Can I buy you a drink? She'll have a water, double Jack rocks for me..."
"Who's your daddy?" (looking at belly)
;)
Have a fun 4th all....prego or not!
It was, but hey! Topics breed other topics, I guess. By the way, HAHAHA! Priceless pick-up lines
Thanks Tam-B! ;D
This is like "should pregnant women drive cars".
One would hope the women who go out to clubs while pregnant understand any risk and would hopefully avoid drinking. If she can handle all the super judgmental people who obviously think the world is too dangerous for pregnant women to enjoy themselves, then by all means.
I personally wouldn't serve an obviously pregnant woman in regards to my own personal ethics. And, I would frown upon a pregnant woman walking into a bar or club in which smoking is allowed. But, it's that woman's decision. Not your's. Not anyone else's (except the dad. He should have a say if he decides to be involved).
Anything and everything is considered "risky" or "dangerous" when a woman is pregnant. Too much this, not enough that.
I say, it's none of your business or mine. That won't stop people from judging a pregnant woman who decides to have fun.
(Oh no! She's growing a human, 24/7, which means her body is no longer her's whatsoever and she MUST do every last little thing from how she chews her food to denying herself enjoyment for the baby, because she'll probably hurt it if she doesn't take care of it - she doesn't matter, only the baby!)
Just saying, a woman's emotional well-being while pregnant is pretty important. Not just protecting the baby and such. BTW, babies are as strong as platinum (metaphorically) while in the womb after the first trimester. Just sayin'.
My cousin's wife tells a story of being out with a friend and their spouses
in some establishment in Alachua County years ago.
Both of the women were very pregnant, but while their husbands were not present,
men would ask if they were with anyone.
Her reply? "Yeah, we're with child...".,
Quote from: AntigoneStarr on July 05, 2012, 05:28:08 AM
This is like "should pregnant women drive cars".
One would hope the women who go out to clubs while pregnant understand any risk and would hopefully avoid drinking. If she can handle all the super judgmental people who obviously think the world is too dangerous for pregnant women to enjoy themselves, then by all means.
I personally wouldn't serve an obviously pregnant woman in regards to my own personal ethics. And, I would frown upon a pregnant woman walking into a bar or club in which smoking is allowed. But, it's that woman's decision. Not your's. Not anyone else's (except the dad. He should have a say if he decides to be involved).
Anything and everything is considered "risky" or "dangerous" when a woman is pregnant. Too much this, not enough that.
I say, it's none of your business or mine. That won't stop people from judging a pregnant woman who decides to have fun.
(Oh no! She's growing a human, 24/7, which means her body is no longer her's whatsoever and she MUST do every last little thing from how she chews her food to denying herself enjoyment for the baby, because she'll probably hurt it if she doesn't take care of it - she doesn't matter, only the baby!)
Just saying, a woman's emotional well-being while pregnant is pretty important. Not just protecting the baby and such. BTW, babies are as strong as platinum (metaphorically) while in the womb after the first trimester. Just sayin'.
Having an opinion on a topic and asking what others think isn't acting as if you're trying to make something "your business" Like I said before, when I spotted a very pregnant lady in a club/bar/restaurant I didn't frown at her, shake my head at her, scream "Pregnant girl in the room!" or demand she go home right now and strap herself to her bed. I just found it a tad amusing and interesting, which led to my desire on finding out what others thought of it.
Just saying!
Quote from: BridgeTroll on July 04, 2012, 02:41:15 PM
Quote from: Ocklawaha on July 04, 2012, 02:38:24 PM
Thank's BT, FINALLY another voice of reasoned sanity!
Many would not credit me with that attribute... ;)
I think you're right on, as far as this goes. Hit the nail on the head.
Quote from: billy on July 05, 2012, 09:19:14 AM
My cousin's wife tells a story of being out with a friend and their spouses
in some establishment in Alachua County years ago.
Both of the women were very pregnant, but while their husbands were not present,
men would ask if they were with anyone.
Her reply? "Yeah, we're with child...".,
I gotta get the name of that club!
It may have been something like The Big Oak.........