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Community => Break Room => Topic started by: Captain Zissou on July 08, 2010, 03:26:03 PM

Title: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: Captain Zissou on July 08, 2010, 03:26:03 PM
I don't know why there isn't a discussion of this somewhere on the website. Every other credible news source in the galaxy is covering it.  Here is a comprehensive article I got from http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/100708 (http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/100708)

I didn't include the whole article, because I don't think that is encouraged on this site.

QuoteCountdown to the LeBronocalypse

Simmons By Bill Simmons
ESPN.com
Archive | Contact

Careful; this column will self-destruct at 9 on Thursday night. I can't remember writing a column that had a shorter shelf life. Twelve hours and it turns bad like leftover sushi. Let's call this "Twenty-Three Random Thoughts Before Tonight's LeBronocalypse."

1. A few weeks after the 2008 Summer Olympics, Someone Who Knows Things told me the following rumor: LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh and Chris Paul became such good friends during the 2007 Olympic trials, and then during their 2008 Olympics excursion in Beijing, that they actually made a pact in China to play together. You know, like one of those pacts in a chick flick where two friends agree to get married if both of them are single when they turn 40.

As the rumor went, the 2010 free agents (LeBron, Wade and Bosh) would sign with the same team (at that point the Knicks if they created enough cap room), then Paul would join them in 2012 (or sooner). I thought this was the craziest thing I had ever heard -- so crazy, I only mentioned it once (in a November '08 column). It reminded me of being in my mid-20s in Las Vegas, gambling in the wee hours with my single high school buddies, then all of us drunkenly saying, "We should all pick one city and live there, we'd just go out and kill it every night!" Then you wake up the next morning and forget it was ever discussed. So even if the China rumor was true, that didn't mean it was actually going to happen. Or so I thought.

2. Fast-forward two summers: If LeBron says the word "Miami" tonight, does that mean the rumor was true? Or at least discussed by those guys? Because how could anyone make up something that loony? In 2008, you and I could have sat in a room for 10 hours trying to make up the craziest possible sports rumor and never come up with "Bosh, LeBron, Wade and/or Paul all made a pact in China to play together" without throwing in some improbably bizarre addendum like, "And they did so right after covering up the shooting of Jayson Williams' chauffeur." Was the rumor accurate? Did they stick to their guns? Will we ever find out the truth? Because if they did make a pact, that means …

3. Stephen A. Smith wins the Woodward & Bernstein Award for reporting last week that Wade/LeBron/Bosh in Miami was "done." I thought it was ridiculous. How could it be "done"? Bosh and LeBron were committing to an owner, president and coach without meeting any of them?

My guess at the time: Smith got word that Miami was in the lead, took it and ran with it, then hoped he was right. If he was right, he became the big winner of the summer of 2010. If he was wrong, he could always claim that he WAS right, but that something got screwed up and things changed. I busted his chops a few times on Twitter about it; when he reported one week later that Bosh might be heading for Houston, it sure seemed like Smith was talking out of his butt like Ace Ventura. But if LeBron announces Miami tonight? Then Smith is vindicated and I'm giving myself the byline "William J. Simmons" in my next column as an apology. Although …

4. I'm still not crazy about any report that says "done" unless it's definitely, 100 percent done.

Quick tangent: I like the engagement-ring corollary for all sports reporting. If a friend calls me and says "I'm engaged," I always want to know if they actually got the ring. Give her the ring, you're engaged. If not, "Let's get married" may have been something thrown out there during a drunken dinner, right after sex, during a makeup session after an argument … who the hell knows? I want to see that ring. Once you get the ring, there's no going back. You're locked in. You can get out, but it's almost impossible, and even worse, you might have a one-carat diamond whipped at you at 65 miles an hour.

Had Smith said, "I learned tonight that Miami is the prohibitive favorite to get all three; someone would have to go back on their word for this not to happen," then it played out the way it had, he would have been the Nostradamu-SAS of this thing. But he tried to get engaged without the ring. Still, he gets a partial credit for sniffing it out. Nobody else had the Miami scenario. And if Smith DID have accurate intelligence and it WAS done, then that means the guys panicked and concocted every event these past eight days -- every waffle, every leak, every extra meeting -- just to throw us off the scent.

Did they willfully snooker the general public? Four red flags indicate they may have (assuming LeBron signs with Miami, of course).

5. Red Flag No. 1: Wade and Bosh (who have the same agent, by the way) hired documentary crews to follow them around. As any reality-show junkie knows, if there's no drama, you have to manufacture it. Well, how could a free-agency documentary (or reality show, or web series, or whatever they do with this footage) have drama if both guys decided where they were going weeks ago? You'd have to center it around Wade's upcoming divorce, or Bosh struggling to decide whether to stay with his girlfriend or hook up with those gorgeous half-Cuban models that only exist in South Beach. And neither guy would ever do that. So what works? Indecision. Meetings. More meetings. A lot of "agonizing." If this footage ever sees the light of day, I bet the acting is worse than your average episode of "The Hills." You wait.

6. Red Flag No. 2: Wade's second visit with Chicago (the old "I really might do this, look, I'm meeting with them again!" trick) was a textbook reality ploy. Look, I've logged my fair share of reality TV over the years. It's one of my vices, along with gambling, Sour Patch kids, Sly Stallone movies and unprotected sex in hotel saunas. (Fine, I made that last one up.) If I were producing Wade's documentary, I would have told him, "After we meet with the Bulls, let's leak information that you want to meet them a second time, and that you want to be closer to your kids post-divorce, then after the meeting we'll shoot a scene of you walking along Lake Michigan deep in thought like you're deciding what to do. Just trust me. It will be great TV." That's what you do when you fake reality. And that second Chicago meeting sure seemed fake.

(Also helping this theory: Multiple teams -- that's right, multiple -- believe Wade went through the free-agency process partly to spy on Miami's competitors for Pat Riley. And if he did? Savvy. Why not? Did you ever think an NBA free-agency period would include the word "spy"? That would have been the wackiest thing that happened this summer if Darko Milicic, Channing Frye, Amir Johnson and Drew Gooden hadn't signed for a combined $114 million on the same day Atlanta offered Joe Johnson $120 million to thank him for leading the Hawks to a four-game sweep in Round 2 in which they were outscored by 25 points per game.)

7. Red Flag No. 3: Wade is 28 years old and just finishing a bitter divorce. He's earned max money for exactly three years and doesn't have a second payday looming in 2016 like Bosh and LeBron do. As we learned with Antoine Walker and Allen Iverson, "wealthy" superstars are never quite as wealthy as we think. Walking away from a sixth guaranteed year in Miami (and no state income tax) when he's battled serious injuries in the past? No way. This was his one chance to bank as much money as possible. It was always going to be Miami.

8. Red Flag No. 4: Bosh clearly wanted to emerge from this summer more famous than he was. I know this because he hired his own documentary crew. Because he made an "Entourage" cameo last month. Because someone who attended one of Bosh's free-agent meetings told me that Bosh was considerably more concerned with his camera crew than hearing the team's pitch. Because he asked his Twitter followers where he should play next year -- a slap in the face to everyone in Toronto who supported him these past seven years -- and because I attended two different 2010 Lakers games at which Bosh inexplicably walked a complete lap around the court while holding hands with his girlfriend, like someone who just wanted to be seen. And it worked. You see a 7-foot basketball player strolling 0.02 miles an hour around a basketball court, you're going to notice him.

If you want fame, then attaching yourself to Wade and/or LeBron in a major market is the way to go. That's what Bosh did. Orlando's Stan Van Gundy even hissed yesterday that Bosh followed Wade around for two weeks like a "lapdog." Doesn't sound like someone who ever seriously considered anywhere but Miami. Add those four red flags together and it's pretty clear, in retrospect, that Wade and Bosh never seriously looked elsewhere. You know, because any time you can play in a city with such rich basketball tradition, you have to do it. It's hard not to get inspired during the national anthem when you see Rony Seikaly's number in the rafters.

9. If one more person refers to Bosh as a "superstar," I'm going to scream. His résumé: seven seasons, 11 career playoff games, one second-team All-NBA selection, never played in a big game in his life other than the gold-medal game of the 2008 Olympics. Now he's fleeing frigid Toronto for South Beach, no state income tax, Dwyane Wade, max money and the playoffs … and this makes him a "superstar"? Did we really drop our standards that low?

Look, I need my NBA superstar to sell tickets, generate interest locally and nationally, single-handedly guarantee an average supporting cast 45-50 wins, and potentially be the best player on a Finals team if the other pieces are in place, which means only LeBron, Wade, Howard, Durant and Kobe qualify. There's a level just a shade below (the Almost-But-Not-Quite-Superstar) with Steve Nash, Dirk Nowitzki, Carmelo Anthony, Brandon Roy, Chris Paul and Deron Williams. (Note: I think Derrick Rose gets there next season.) Then you have elite guys like Bosh, Pau Gasol and Amare Stoudemire who need good teammates to help them thrive … and if they don't have them, you're heading to the lottery.

You know what we call these people? All-Stars. Although if LeBron picks Miami, we have to call Bosh something else: lucky. On a good team, he could absolutely thrive like Gasol did on the Lakers, although he's not as sure a bet because Gasol played in so many big games overseas before the Lakers stole him. (Bosh had the opposite experience: He's never played in a Sweet 16, a Game 7 or even Round 2 of the NBA playoffs.) Hearing Bosh referred to as a "superstar" these past few weeks left me with the same face Jake had on Monday's "Bachelor" special when Vienna wouldn't shut up and kept undermining and emasculating him. If Chris Bosh is your third-best player, you're in tremendous shape. Just don't think you can win a title with a 228-pound big man who doesn't block shots and grabs 10 rebounds a night. You need more help than that. Which brings us to …

10. Let's say LeBron signs with Miami. Can you even make the Finals with LeBron, Bosh, Wade and nine minimum-salary guys? Because that might be next year's team … and if that's what happens, the answer is "no effing way." You don't win titles just because of your top three. That belittles the meaning of guys like Derek Fisher, Robert Horry, Steve Kerr, John Paxson, Brian Shaw … you could go on for hours naming role players who swung a title. The 2008 Celts lucked out by getting James Posey, Eddie House and P.J. Brown for practically nothing; Miami wouldn't have that luxury this summer, not with so many role players jockeying for contracts one year before the possible lockout. Nobody is taking less money to showcase themselves for a summer that might not happen. Even if Miami could spin Michael Beasley for a fourth guy (say, Trevor Ariza), that's still not enough. They'd need one more rebounder, point guard, a 3-point shooter and a center. Good luck.





..........


Quote24. The goofiest part of these past few weeks: The way media people have been speculating in a way that seems like a cross between learned information and opinion, except we're never really sure what's real and what's conjecture. Thanks to Twitter and the 24/7 news cycle, the lines have been blurred completely. Chuck Klosterman thinks the true hero of the LeBron saga is Brian Windhorst, the Cleveland Plain Dealer reporter who cranked out articles and Tweets by the boatload -- never speculation, always facts, always backed up by sources, and there were a couple of times when he made you wonder, "Wait a second, is Windhorst hiding under a table in LeBron's office right now?" Maybe he was.

Sifting through the various reports and tweets, trying to figure out fact from fiction, glancing at my BlackBerry every 15 seconds to see if anyone e-mailed me … that's what I'll remember from the LeBronocalypse more than anything else. And also, who knew anyone could keep a secret for this long in the Twitter/TMZ Era? Even yesterday, when I was batting around LeBron theories with my buddy Connor, we were breaking down the Greenwich thing and had this exchange:

-- Connor: "Greenwich, that's nine minutes from the Knicks' practice facility. That has to mean something."

-- Me (thinking): "Maybe they KNEW it was nine minutes from the Knicks' practice facility, so they put it there to throw people off the scent."

Again, go to http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/100708 (http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/100708) for more info.
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: jbroadglide on July 08, 2010, 04:15:28 PM
Am I the only one that doesn't give a rats hind end about LeBron James? Or what team he ends up with? I mean really, who frikkin' cares??!! Outside of Cleveland, that is.
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: JC on July 08, 2010, 05:38:46 PM
Quote from: jbroadglide on July 08, 2010, 04:15:28 PM
Am I the only one that doesn't give a rats hind end about LeBron James? Or what team he ends up with? I mean really, who frikkin' cares??!! Outside of Cleveland, that is.

I dont care either, in fact I was relieved not to see any mention on this site. Thanks for ruining it Captain Zissou!  I understand that he is "great" but... meh... wait... must... stop... too much time wasted on this already
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: buckethead on July 08, 2010, 07:19:54 PM
If LaBron has even one hair on his ass, he will remain a Cav.

MJ leaving the Bulls? Blasphemy. We know he wishes to be considered as Jordan.
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: JeffreyS on July 08, 2010, 07:44:24 PM
I would probably choose NY or Chicago over Cleavland.  I am interested but not enough to watch the ESPN special.
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: JC on July 09, 2010, 12:20:30 AM
That dumb ass chose Miami!  Really anything but Cleveland was the wrong choice in my opinion.  He is a total selfish loser!
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: hanjin1 on July 09, 2010, 02:02:15 AM
i have some choice words that would probably get me banned here, so i won't say, but this guy is a total $&*%^#. but the cavs owner had some nice things to say about him. you should check it out.
http://www.nba.com/cavaliers/news/gilbert_letter_100708.html (http://www.nba.com/cavaliers/news/gilbert_letter_100708.html)

A Letter From Cavaliers Majority Owner Dan Gilbert

Dear Cleveland, All Of Northeast Ohio and Cleveland Cavaliers Supporters Wherever You May Be Tonight;

As you now know, our former hero, who grew up in the very region that he deserted this evening, is no longer a Cleveland Cavalier.

This was announced with a several day, narcissistic, self-promotional build-up culminating with a national TV special of his "decision" unlike anything ever "witnessed" in the history of sports and probably the history of entertainment.

Clearly, this is bitterly disappointing to all of us.

The good news is that the ownership team and the rest of the hard-working, loyal, and driven staff over here at your hometown Cavaliers have not betrayed you nor NEVER will betray you.

There is so much more to tell you about the events of the recent past and our more than exciting future. Over the next several days and weeks, we will be communicating much of that to you.

You simply don't deserve this kind of cowardly betrayal.

You have given so much and deserve so much more.

In the meantime, I want to make one statement to you tonight:

"I PERSONALLY GUARANTEE THAT THE CLEVELAND CAVALIERS WILL WIN AN NBA CHAMPIONSHIP BEFORE THE SELF-TITLED FORMER ‘KING’ WINS ONE"

You can take it to the bank.

If you thought we were motivated before tonight to bring the hardware to Cleveland, I can tell you that this shameful display of selfishness and betrayal by one of our very own has shifted our "motivation" to previously unknown and previously never experienced levels.

Some people think they should go to heaven but NOT have to die to get there.

Sorry, but that's simply not how it works.

This shocking act of disloyalty from our home grown "chosen one" sends the exact opposite lesson of what we would want our children to learn. And "who" we would want them to grow-up to become.

But the good news is that this heartless and callous action can only serve as the antidote to the so-called "curse" on Cleveland, Ohio.

The self-declared former "King" will be taking the "curse" with him down south. And until he does "right" by Cleveland and Ohio, James (and the town where he plays) will unfortunately own this dreaded spell and bad karma.

Just watch.

Sleep well, Cleveland.

Tomorrow is a new and much brighter day....

I PROMISE you that our energy, focus, capital, knowledge and experience will be directed at one thing and one thing only:

DELIVERING YOU the championship you have long deserved and is long overdue....



Dan Gilbert
Majority Owner
Cleveland Cavaliers
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: buckethead on July 09, 2010, 06:43:50 AM
Quote from: JC on July 09, 2010, 12:20:30 AM
That dumb ass chose Miami!  Really anything but Cleveland was the wrong choice in my opinion.  He is a total selfish loser!
FL has no state Income Tax.

A no brainer.

Still, he should have remained a Cav.
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: tufsu1 on July 09, 2010, 08:16:24 AM
I heard a great comment last night from a sports reporter....he basically said,

"How said is our urban planning when the fate of a city is held up by a basketball player"

Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: jbroadglide on July 09, 2010, 08:22:14 AM
Quote from: tufsu1 on July 09, 2010, 08:16:24 AM
I heard a great comment last night from a sports reporter....he basically said,

"How said is our urban planning when the fate of a city is held up by a basketball player"


AMEN!!
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: comncense on July 09, 2010, 08:54:04 AM
I think he made the right choice to leave. It's a business decision at the end of the day. The Cavs had 7 years to build a winning team around him. As of last year, the Cavs were still a 1 man team. They had just as much opportunity to offer him a good reason to stay as the teams had a means to offer him a reason to leave. Also let's not forget that there's been many times teams have cut players without them even knowing they've been traded until they catch it on the radio or Sportscenter. Why stick around another year in Cleveland and you know you won't get anywhere near the NBA finals? The Lakers put all-stars around Kobe. The Celtics have an All-Star starting lineup for the most part and even Orlando has a decent lineup. The Cavs were Lebron and an old, rusty Shaq. Good move by Lebron.
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: RiversideLoki on July 09, 2010, 12:59:13 PM
Who the hell is LeBron? Like really, I don't watch sports.
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: hanjin1 on July 09, 2010, 01:22:20 PM
Quote from: comncense on July 09, 2010, 08:54:04 AM
I think he made the right choice to leave. It's a business decision at the end of the day. The Cavs had 7 years to build a winning team around him. As of last year, the Cavs were still a 1 man team. They had just as much opportunity to offer him a good reason to stay as the teams had a means to offer him a reason to leave. Also let's not forget that there's been many times teams have cut players without them even knowing they've been traded until they catch it on the radio or Sportscenter. Why stick around another year in Cleveland and you know you won't get anywhere near the NBA finals? The Lakers put all-stars around Kobe. The Celtics have an All-Star starting lineup for the most part and even Orlando has a decent lineup. The Cavs were Lebron and an old, rusty Shaq. Good move by Lebron.

everyone brings up this point about teams cutting players and such, but teams don't have 1 hour specials on espn touting if they should or should not cut a player and then donating their proceeds to the art modell foundation
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: Captain Zissou on July 09, 2010, 01:23:39 PM
Quote from: tufsu1 on July 09, 2010, 08:16:24 AM
I heard a great comment last night from a sports reporter....he basically said,

"How said is our urban planning when the fate of a city is held up by a basketball player"



I agree.  Outside of NY, these cities are fighting like the Health and Wealth of their MSA is dependent on whether or not they have a person who has innate ability to bounce a ball and then throw it through a circle.

I don't care about basketball too much, especially the NBA, but I do care about finance.  When Lebron articles kept popping up on Google Finance all day, I knew this had to be big.  
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: copperfiend on July 09, 2010, 02:01:44 PM
If he stayed in Cleveland, people would have complained that he doesn't care about winning.

If he went to New York, people would have complained that he only cares about making money.

He goes to Miami and people are complaining that he can only win a title with another superstar.

He can't win with the public.
Title: Re: 'LeBronocalypse'
Post by: JC on July 09, 2010, 03:36:39 PM
Quote from: copperfiend on July 09, 2010, 02:01:44 PM
If he stayed in Cleveland, people would have complained that he doesn't care about winning.

If he went to New York, people would have complained that he only cares about making money.

He goes to Miami and people are complaining that he can only win a title with another superstar.

He can't win with the public.

This doesnt sound like a losing team to me!

June 25 - The 2009 NBA Draft took place in New York City.
July 8 - The free agency period started.
March 17 - The Cavaliers clinched the Central Division title for the second straight year, and the third time in franchise history.
April 2 - The Cavaliers clinched best record in the Eastern Conference for the second straight year, and the second time in franchise history.
April 4 - The Cavaliers clinched the best record in the league, and thus home court advantage throughout the playoffs for the second straight year, and the second time in franchise history.
May 13- The Cavaliers lose in the Eastern Conference Semifinals to the underdog Boston Celtics. This is the third time in a row that the Cavaliers have exited the playoffs before the NBA Finals.
May 24- Head coach, Mike Brown, was fired.
July 8- Franchise player Lebron James announces his decision to leave for the Miami Heat and team up with Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh.